Hello my wonderful family. I hope y'all had a rockin' New Years! There sure isn't another place/life I would have rather woken up in on Jan 1! I love the life I live:)
2017 could not have began any more miraculously. On a mission I believe you hit a time where you feel like you are working harder than you ever have, doing everything you possibly can to go the extra mile, mentally tired stretching for earnest heavenly help with your heart completely submersed and vulnerable and yet...you see nothing. And that's where i felt I was at. Day after day I gave Him everything I knew how to. Of course I knew God was with me and I knew the work has absolutely nothing to do with me and me seeing the fruits but you can't help but feel defeated at times. I have done pretty good at staying full of hope my whole mission but Sunday morning after we had tried to pick up a family of kids we teach and their struggling mama refused it was a little punch. And Jashanti and her mom who we've been really breaking though with lately didn't show. And my heart hurt. I sat there during the sacrament emotionally and physically exhausted asking God what more I could possibly do. Asking him for his hope and strength. Questioning where am I going wrong.
I know this is a raw, emotional draining email BUT what I want to say is that God is real and he knows all well better than me and all of us. That afternoon we went to see Katherine, Cedric's bed ridden mom whom we have been teaching extensively. She had gotten her answer. Cedric was standing in the kitchen the night before when she said "I want to be sealed to you FOREVER." She has had so many concerns and questions and doubts (as any one who is honestly seeking should have) and she finally has felt God connect it for Her to feel the truth of this Gospel. Both Sister Anderson and I became emotional. I sat there in awe at how aware He is. How no matter where we are in life or how much we have lived he will provide. He knew Katherine and has been by her bed side much more than we were ever able to be. There are still some set backs we are working through as to how to physically get her baptized and to church but peace is in her heart and mine.
The lesson God taught me that day and every day roots from the divine principle of trusting our Maker. He has a plan for each one of His children. I know my sole happiness is only present when my TRUST in him is also. How he loves us. How he knows us.
I love and miss y'all daily:) I have the best family, how I am BLESSED!
Take a look at my cute New Years KISS:)